Karl Dahlin: The Eulogy I Should Have Given!

At the memorial celebration that followed the funeral service for my second oldest brother, Karl (in the Dahlin Family house), afterwards, I had many people look in my direction urging me to share a story or two.  In my mind I wrestled with all the stories that I had spinning around in my head that could adequately capture the essence of Karl. The dilemma I had was trying to come up with THE ONE BEST STORY of the hundreds of memories that flooded my thoughts at that moment.

This time together was about celebrating his life, drawing closure and neatly putting things in categories that help us deal with the passing of a loved one. I walked away with regret that my brain couldn't produce something to share in the moment.  Then I spent an entire day beating myself up for such an epic fail.  

THEN IT CAME!  Unfortunately, it came to me at 2:29am smack dab in the middle of the night, 37 hours too late. 

Let me begin by asserting my premise right up front in one small phrase; The Power of CONNECTION and Beauty of authentic messy COMMUNITY!

When I looked around at the faces in that backyard I was overwhelmed by the real sense of community that we all shared and how each person there had a story that connected them to Karl, which in turn connected us all to each other. Wow! Although I had a million Dahlin stories there also were Blaser stories, and Lennon stories, and Tripp stories, and Nargie stories, and Grant stories, and McClain stories and Daniel stories and Irvine stories and Dugan stories and Sasson stories and Koz and Charlie and Jack and John and Tom and Ray and Ian and Greg and Tuna canyon and Sycamore canyon and Dogtown and Jeff Ho and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar stories and Bob Dylan stories... 

(pictured to the left is Bob Dylan in Red Shirt - with Karl, Kurt and Bob). 

...and the crazy Rooster stories. There were stories that took place in Venice and in Marina Del Rey and at Bass lake; stories that included Bob Furhman and Pinky Parlette and our very SPECIAL TWINS - David and Lisa. 

There are stories of the “hooch-hut” out back at “Wall Drug” and pool stories and electrocution stories and boat stories and Fish Stories – that connect us all to Karl and all to each other.  

When I look at Karl’s kids – I see his love for fishing that will live on. I see his creativity and how the skill of craftsmanship had been passed down to David along with the blonde hair of his youth.  With Michael Jon, I see the sensitive heart of Karl that endured him to so many people. When I look at Karlee I see his eyes and his beautiful thick hair and the strength of character. I marveled at how if you took all three of them and squished them together into one person you would get Karl.  Together they embody who he is - his life lives through them and his legacy lives through all of us who were blessed to be a part of those stories.

OH, I HAVE STORIES! Plenty of them. 

Stories like:      Letting monkeys out of the Zoo 
                        The infamous Veloci-Raptor

                                                            Johnny the pigeon

                                                            Lazarus the cat
                                                            Poochie the "Wonder Dog" 

                                                            Halloween and the Saints 

                                                            Sawing his 57 Ford in half for a dune buggy

                                                            The Alligator

                                                            The Mexican Tomato Plants

Hollister

                                                            Fishing

                                                            Nearly being killed in a storm at sea

                                                            Grandpa the giant, chick-eating bullfrog

                                                            “Haircut Saturdays”

                                                             Being chased out of Lancaster

                                                             Kings River

                                                            The storm at Salton Sea

                                                            Pranks on poor old Edna next door. 

                                                            Stealing Avocados

                                                            Wresting in the front yard

                                                            “Templates”

                                                            Albino Camp hikes

                                                            Cross country trips and Dad's 67 Ford Squire

                                                            President Johnson and snapping turtles

                                                            Red ants 

                                                            Horticulture

                                                            Stained glass windows

                                                            Kitchen cabinets

                                                            Leaky boats

                                                            Rebellious boat motors

                                                            Softball..."Pinners" 

                                                            Shared Birthday parties

                                                            Broken bones - lots and lots of them!

                                                            Boxing matches in the living room

                                                            Listening to the Beatles and the Beach Boys

                                                            Dancing in the living room

                                                            Milk Wars

                                                            Reptiles 
                                                            Rattlesnake escapes...

…stories and stories and more stories – BUT, what I realized when I looked around was - what a great reminder that there is probably no neighborhood in America THEN or NOW where there will ever be so many people in a unique mix of bizarre, funny, flawed, adventurous, risk taking, loving community of real people who are still connected in such a beautiful and powerful demonstration of what it means to be truly human!

  

Karl, I miss you more today than I did yesterday… you will be a part of us forever…and part of an amazing story that can never be duplicated with a legacy that is etched into our hearts, forged into our memories and cherished as we continue to tell our stories (no matter how embellished) that will assure you will never be forgotten and serve to remind us to cherish the relationships we have. We had something very special on Harding Avenue and we still have that powerful connection and sense of beautiful-messiness of community.  

Thank you to all who attended, to all those offering heart felt thoughts, and for all the prayers and condolences.

Karl, you were there when I came into the world and it was my great honor to be with you when you left this one!   

With Love, your baby “Birthday” brother… Mark!