'72 swim team

'72 swim team
My New Tribe
Showing posts with label John F. Kennedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label John F. Kennedy. Show all posts

Monday, November 25, 2013

"Long-Hair Hippy Commies" and Markie's Death



11:21 AM
The phone rang like 20 times before one of the hippies finally decided to answer it.  Normally, no one in our family would answer the phone – that was Joan’s job.   Joan was my mom.

Our living room and dining room were filled with the delirious Wolf Pack that had been back in the hidden ivy hangout we called "Wall Drug" communing with the herbs they secretly grew under the code name of “Mexican tomato plants” 

So our house was filled with the likes of this group...(including "Pinky" pictured far left).
 and this motely crew...


And this bunch...
along with this heterogeneous collection...







...all except for Bob of course.  He was in Vietnam! 


             And I'm not talking about a vacation. 




You see, my older brothers (that's all my brothers- by the way, if you haven't caught on by now), no longer used the affectionate and intimate designation of “mom” and “dad.” Instead, they called our parents by their first names or with titles, like - Joan and Mr. D.  I think mom and dad had come to terms with these labels that expressed a distance in relationship. This remote detachment was safe for the unfeeling Wolf-Pack because it was a declaration that there were no demands on their relationship other than existing under the same roof as hostile roommates. 
 
I don’t think my parents minded that too much because it represented a separation of values. Although we were all born democrats, my parents were conservative “Kennedy Democrats”  - you know - a strong America… less government… programs that care for people… but not giving away our future by putting the yoke of debt around the necks of generations not yet born – through wasteful government spending.  Though the world had changed a lot in the last five years since Kennedy’s assassination, their political views remained unchanged and they considered the motley – long-haired, draft-card-burning crew as “dope-smoking commies.” 

 




I think a couple of the Lennon boys were present –  and if I had to guess, they probably still called their parents "mom" and "dad."






Anyway, Chewbacca finally answered the phone and couldn’t make out what Kjersten was saying through all the blubbering sobs and stupid stuff about a leg being cut off and someone dead by the side of the pool. This phone called was just a nuisance to him so he kicked Flea-Bait in the butt and told him to tell Joan she had a phone call – half thinking she might have already been eavesdropping with her little suction-cup-bugging-device she used for wiretapping every conversation the boys had with their girlfriends.

In our house, no one ran up the stairs anymore to tell someone when they were wanted on the phone.  It was viewed as a frivolous waste of energy.  Our communication system was standing at the foot of the stairs and screaming as loud as you can – making sure to use derogatory nicknames that the Wolf-Pack invented –so the Steadmans and the Tripps across the street could hear.

“Hey Puke Breath, phone’s for you!” Or  “Lardo…Pick up the phone!” or “Dooh-Dooh Pants…” they would scream at the top of their lungs while hitting the wall with a broom like dad does on street-cleaning day, and then they would top that off with something really nice like, “You stupid idiot you got a phone call.”  
  
Kindness was not generally found among the list of adjectives used to describe our family.

“Joan”Flea-Bait yelled, hoping to please the older boys.

"... pick up the phone!”
Flea-Bait felt his job was done and Chewbacca had set the receiver down, forgetting about who was on the other end and the urgency of the call altogether. 

Like most typical Saturdays (ever since the zoo incident), Mom had locked herself in her room. Trying to drown out the noise from the raucous below, she turned up the volume on a rerun of Gun Smoke.

11:30 am

When the episode was over, she picked up the phone to call Ida Nargie, who lived across the street, for gossip only to discover the sobbing and the tearful pleas of Kjersten still begging on the other end of the line  hoping someone would eventually walk by and pick up the abandoned receiver.  

“Please!” cried the desperate 9-year-old.  “Someone help us. I think he’s dead!” were the first words mom heard. 

“What Kjersten?” she panicked ―freaking out.  “What’s going on?”

“Mom” Kjersten said almost undecipherable through huge sobs that interrupted her words. Mom could hear the frightful crying in the background from the other kids at the pool.

Choking back the word she dreaded to say. in a battle between lips and brain, her brain finally won as she spit out the foulest tasting words a 9-year-old might ever have to experience. “Mom” she bellowed, “he’s dead.” More crying!  More tears!

Shock! “Kjersten, who’s dead?”  Mom asked, screaming through the receiver in order to get Kjersten's full attention.

 “Markie!” she answered as the flood gates of words began spilling.  It’s Markie… there was a booger and vomit and Ulrich and then there was cold water... and then a pushing match and…and…and…and Ralph went one way and Markie went the other―”

“Kjersten, slow down and just tell me what happened.” 

Kjersten began bawling again. “And…and…and…Markie flew through the glass wall… and his leg is cut off… and he’s lying in a pool of blood…and we think he’s dead...and we didn’t know who to call. Help…Mom!” she resorted to, desperately pleading in incomplete thoughts and tears.

Joan jumped from her bed, unlocked the five latches on her bedroom door and frantically leaped into action. She raced downstairs parting the red sea of long-hair commies partying below, hysterically soliciting help and trying to find the keys to a car that had more than a bucks worth of gas and that didn’t have to be push started.
  
11:03 am - 30 minutes earlier

Markie wanted to show Ralph who was boss and slipped out of his grip again. Just as Markied had planned, Ralph shot backwards like a rocket ship right into the pool. What Markie failed to calculate into his equation was the 12 foot stationary wall of glass 2 feet directly behind him.

 “For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction”

Markie shot like the Apollo 7 launched a few days ago and flew backwards crashing through the glass wall. Up to this point, the 12-year-old had proven to be pretty indestructible (he had bested pits, and arrows, and ropes and hampers and lived through Salton Sea, but this time he was no match for the tremendous force of this fatal impact. The plate glass shattered spraying shards and fragments throughout the entire recreation room adjacent to the pool. 

Laying bent over the couch, which was just inside the room behind the glass panel– Markie straddled the galls wall - half in and half out of the room. Thankfully, shock had immediately set in and Markie felt no pain, but neither was his brain capable of  processing the severity of the accident! It wasn’t until he tried to stand up by hoisting himself off the couch that he saw the pointed top of glass, which had been protruding through his left thigh.  

Pushing up off the couch, he staggered to his feet as the glass ripped open his entire leg. 

Blood 
Bone
Blood
Muscle
Blood

Looking down into the middle of his leg, Markie laid down on the cold deck where blood mixed with water and tried to hold his dangling appendage together. He told the other kids a joke to ease their pain and to help Ralph with his guilt. Slipping into unconsciousness he told Kjersten to call home… “EXbrook 8 - 0466” he told his baby sister not sure whether she knew the number.  Closing his eyes, he quietly slipped away  whispering the "dying" prayer Sister Edith Mary taught his 7th grade class.

Crying and hysterical, Kjersten made the call and waited for what seemed like an hour after Chewbacca put down the receiver and had kicked Flea Bait in the butt.   

Feeling helpless, Tommy Blaser and Annie Lennon cried, having absolutely no idea what to do. Things like this just didn't happen at the Lennon or the Blaser house, so this was new for them.

Meanwhile, Ralph was useless. He just walked around in circles crying and talking to himself as if he testifying about his innocence in a court of law.  Either that or he figured that if his excuse was good enough, he could buy some time out of  purgatory, not to mention the guilt he was feeling - having had something to do with the murder of his best friend. 

 "Be nice to each other, while you have the chance. You might not get another one."    Markie D   5th grade 








Thursday, November 21, 2013

Equal and Opposite Reaction: Deadly Missile

I know this isn't the best photo in the world, but the picture above gives you a glimpse of what life was like at my house on just about any day of the week.  
   Chaos and Mayhem! 


On the very left (of the picture above) is one of our tribe members who had been knighted with the nickname, "Pinky." He joined our family when he was about 12 - that's when I was only about 6.  When he was in the 7th grade he followed one of my brothers home from school and just ended up staying - like forever. He had been around ever since I had a memory and so I figured he was part of our tribe, but I could tell there was something different about Pinky from the rest of us. Besides the obvious fact that Pinky had dark hair, he was also was about the size of three of us Dahlins put together.  I don't want to say anything that would hurt anyone's feelings, but the guy was...ummmm...large!  One of my brothers said that "Pinky was so big he could kick-start a 747-Jumbo jet."


All that to say, that Pinky and the usual amount of chaos prominently figure into the death story of McIlliot's Pool which started with something very much like the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1962 when Ulrich launched the nuclear warhead of loogie onto American territory down my throat.

The conflict escalted into a full on nuclear retaliation of my own with a puke counter-launch that sprayed everything in a 20 foot radius. I figure it was probably jsut like something between the United States and the Soviet Union. 

This was all very much  like a Dr. Strangelove - if you know what I mean. 
 
I promise there wasn't much in the pool at all, but everyone made a "such a big deal" about it and climbed out of the water as if they would get Diphtheria or Diarrhea from the nuclear fallout of Fish-Stick particles that floated on the surface of the pool.

 Little babies!

I could see Tommy and Kjersten and Annie fussing, but Ralph was a 12-year-old with a mustache. He acted like the biggest baby of them all.
 
I might also be over-reacting, because it hurt my feelings that Ulrich had launch a precision laser-guided warhead of mass destruction and everyone was mad at me for some reason. I felt that someone should have taken my side and been mad at Ulrich with me, BUT NO!  Now, I'm the bad guy.  All I heard for the next 12 minutes is, "Markie D this and Markie D that... Barf-O-Bits this and Barf-O-Bits that... Oil spill this and Oil spill that...ha ha ha ha!"   "Ha ha yourself... I'm rubber and your glue"

How do you tell a little nine year old girl she just hurt your feelings without sounding like a girl yourself. So I just kept it all in while they watched me clean up the concrete pool deck all by myself.

We had about 50 cents between the 5 of us, so I told them to walk down to the corner liquor store and get some candy they could share, while I finished up the duty commensurate with Catholic guilt and penance.  I scrubbed the vomit off the sidewalk next to the pool, saying a couple "Hail Marys" and several "Our Fathers."




When the victorious troops arrived back... Tommy had already eaten the entire Chick-O-Stick without saving me one bite - Ralph was flaunting his candy cigarettes.. and Kjersten and Annie licked the necklace and candy dots they were sharing - knowing that I wouldn't want any.

( I wonder who thought of that one? Candy Cigarettes for kids!) 



Anyway, I figured that I would have the last laugh.

The filter had been running and the pool was clean, but no one in our rambunctious outfit was too interested in jumping into the cool water.

It became one of those games where... we challenged each other to dive in, but that didn't work. Then we tried the game where we could try to fake each other out... "Okay everyone, let's all go in on the count of three. Okay ready, One...Two...Three" we shouted in unison as Ralph and I get an Academy Award for pretending to jump while Kjersten and Annie leapt fool-hardheartedly into the deep end. Tommy didn't fall for it and the three of us boys laughed at the gullible girls.

It felt good for a change to be on the laughing end of something. Still demanding justice and a little hurt, I pushed in Tommy and then Ralph into the water.

I was King of the Universe... at least king of the McElliot pool universe standing all by myself as if I had just won another Olympic Gold Medal in the "king of the hill" competition.  It felt good for about 8 seconds and then it felt like a pretty empty victory after that.

Hang on I'm getting to the "Rat Killer" and to Joan and to the phone call and to the chaos and to the "Pinky" part!

Ralph ended up furious... more than any 12-year-old kid should be - for being pushed into a pool. My goodness, I was going to join him in a second, but he freaked out! He can after me with fire in his eyes that the cold water couldn't put out.

Around and around and around and around we ran. He just wouldn't give up!  He was the oldest boy in his family and had a bunch of older sisters. Maybe he felt like a neutered alpha-male at home and had something to do with his ridiculous rage. This thing was never going to end and I knew that he was never going to catch me! Didn't he know that I spend the greater part of my life running from brothers - EVERY SINGLE DAY?  Doesn't he know that I have learned to fight like a junk yard dog?  Doesn't he remember the infamous "Sour-Dough Toast Fight" of 1966 (blog post 6/29/13). 

There was just no way he was going to win, but I guess wounded pride and ego is a psychological force to be reckoned with. Although he was never going to catch me, I could tell he had no intention of giving up. I needed to offer him a sense of victory to settle things in his mind- the poor fella.  I shifted directions and dodged him for like the umpteenth billionth time, but this time I pretended to not to see him coming the other way and gave myself to him as a ransom.

He was so smug and so happy... but it wasn't real and now I felt guilty (either that or my own sense of evil pride kicked in)!  Kids have weird wiring, right?  I thought "You know what Markie D.. I'll let him push me in, but he'll have to earn it first." I pulled away easily the first time just to show that I may be small, but was a force myself to be reckoned with.  Yawn.. I let him grab me again...and was too squirrely for him to push me into the pool - there was just no way. If I was going to go in just to make him happy then he would have to pull me into the pool. The way I looked at it, if I had to go in, then both of us were going!

He turned and with feet planted on the edge of the pool, he leaned out over the water with the 50 pounds of extra weight he had on me...but I was Markie D!  I thought, "You know what...I'll show him one last time who is boss of this situation." I dug deep into the reservoir of my superhuman adrenaline strength (The kind a mother gets when she lifts up a car to save her baby), and made the decision to break his grip one more time!

My plan was to slip out of his grip,watch him fly backwards into the pool and then join him in the water by swan diving like one of those Acapulco Cliff divers. I wrote myself  to be the hero of this plot.

The only thing I failed to consider - was the fact that as he pulled me into the pool... I was pulling in the opposite direction - directly towards the glass wall of the adjacent pool room.

Do you know that thing about Sir Issac Newton's Third Law of physics, about how every action has an equal and opposite reaction?  Sister Edith said this was very important to space flight and I found out the hard way just how true this really was.

When Ralph took flight and shot backwards into the pool, it also sent me with the equal amount of force in the opposite direction.

Well, the second I left the launching pad with that much force and flying towards that stationary glass wall I knew I was in trouble

"Have you ever noticed sometimes that when you win - you lose"
                                                                                  Markie D